My 5-Year-Old Wants to Invite the Lady Who Visits Dad
It started so innocently. My five-year-old daughter, Lily, was coloring at the kitchen table when she looked up at me with her wide, trusting eyes and said, “Mommy, can we invite the lady who visits Daddy to my birthday party?”
I froze.
“The lady who visits Daddy?” I repeated, trying to keep my voice even.
Lily nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah! The pretty lady. She’s really nice. She always brings Daddy coffee.”
A strange sensation settled in my stomach. I wasn’t sure if it was confusion, dread, or something worse. My ex-husband, Jason, and I had been divorced for a year now. We were doing our best to co-parent, and while the wounds were still fresh, I thought we had found a rhythm. But this? This was new.
I carefully set my coffee mug down. “When do you see this lady, sweetheart?”
Lily didn’t hesitate. “Sometimes when Daddy picks me up from school. She sits in the car. And one time, I saw her in the kitchen.”
The kitchen.
I swallowed hard. I had always assumed Jason would eventually move on, but something about hearing it from my daughter—this unexpected confirmation of another woman in his life—hit differently.
Lily, oblivious to the thoughts racing through my mind, continued. “She smiles at me a lot. And she always smells really nice. She told me she likes my backpack.”
My heart twisted. Whoever she was, she had already made an impression on my child. And Lily, with all her innocence, just wanted to include her in her birthday celebration.
I took a slow breath, forcing a smile. “That’s very kind of you, sweetheart. But birthdays are usually for family and friends. Maybe we can talk to Daddy about it first?”
Lily considered this, then nodded happily, going back to her coloring.
That night, I stared at my phone for what felt like an eternity before finally texting Jason.
Me: Lily mentioned a lady who visits you. Is there something I should know?
The typing bubbles appeared immediately.
Jason: I was going to tell you. Her name is Rachel. We’ve been seeing each other for a few months.
A few months.
I closed my eyes. So this was real. It wasn’t just some fleeting person passing through his life—it was serious enough that she had met our daughter.
A second message popped up.
Jason: She’s good to Lily. I promise.
I didn’t doubt that. If she had been unkind, Lily would have said so. But that didn’t make it easier.
The reality of co-parenting is that, eventually, new people enter the picture. I had known this would happen. I just hadn’t expected it to hit me this hard.
Lily’s voice drifted from her room. “Mommy, can you help me pick out my birthday dress?”
I pushed away the swirling emotions, focusing on what mattered most—her.
“Of course, sweetheart.”
Some things could wait. For now, my little girl’s happiness came first.
