When my son, Jason, brought home a woman my age and declared that she was now the “lady of the house,” I nearly choked on my tea.
Let me back up. I raised Jason as a single mother, working two jobs to make sure he had everything he needed. He’s a grown man now—27 years old, successful, and living in the home I worked my fingers to the bone to provide. I had always hoped he’d find a partner who was kind, loving, and a good match for him. But nothing prepared me for the day he waltzed in with Melissa, a woman in her late forties, and made that audacious announcement.
Melissa sauntered in with an air of ownership, draping her designer coat over my favorite armchair as though she had already claimed her throne. She smiled at me like a cat who had just swallowed a canary and said, “I hope you don’t mind, but Jason and I have decided that it’s time for some changes around here.”
Changes? In my house?
I set my cup down carefully, schooling my expression into one of polite interest. “Oh? What kind of changes?”
Jason cleared his throat. “Well, Mom, Melissa and I are in love, and she’s moving in. Since she’s the woman of the house now, she’ll be handling things. I hope you’ll respect that.”
I stared at him, stunned. He had always been a good boy, if a little spoiled, but this was beyond belief. Did he really think he could just replace me as the matriarch of my own home? Did this woman truly believe she could waltz in and take over?
They didn’t notice the glint in my eye as I smiled and said, “Oh, of course. I understand completely.”
The next morning, I put my plan into action. I prepared a hearty breakfast—one of Jason’s childhood favorites—and called them down. They arrived, looking pleased with themselves, and took their seats at the table. I served their plates with a flourish, then sat back and folded my hands.
Melissa took a bite, then gagged. “What is this?”
Jason made a face. “Mom, this is awful! What happened to your cooking?”
I smiled sweetly. “Oh, I’m not the lady of the house anymore, remember? I figured I should leave all the responsibilities to Melissa. So, I let her cook last night. Enjoy.”
Melissa looked mortified, while Jason’s face turned red. “Mom, you know she didn’t—”
“Oh, but she will,” I interrupted. “Since she’s in charge now, I also took the liberty of canceling my housekeeper. And the grocery shopping? That’s her duty too. Oh, and the bills—since she’s the new lady of the house, she’ll be paying them, right?”
Melissa’s eyes widened. “I… I think there’s been a misunderstanding.”
Jason finally caught on. “Mom, wait—”
I stood, patted his cheek, and said, “You’re welcome to stay, son. But if you think you can dethrone me in my own home, you’ve got another thing coming.”
Melissa left within the week. Jason learned his lesson.
The lady of the house remained exactly where she belonged.
